Memories From the Corners of My Mind

Four and a half years ago, I wrote a blog post the night before I moved out of my old apartment in Schaumburg and moved into Chicago to start my new life. Three days later, my life as I knew it fell apart, one could say - I broke up with my boyfriend of a year and a half and my grandfather passed away a few days later. I've moved through the pain of that time period to capitalize on the excitement I felt back then and build a new life for myself. But, in all its irony, exactly four years and six months later, I moved out of the Wrigleyville apartment where I built that world - to move in with my amazing boyfriend and undertake a new set of risk and rewards. 

It is weird for me to sit on our couch and write this. I still feel like I'm just visiting. It is also weird for me to think of leaving behind the ups and downs of my old place - and the life I had before. I am so grateful to the many friends who passed through those doors and who were there for me through the ups and the downs. I'm sad about the people I've lost touch with. I remember the good memories from relationships, but I also remember so many of the bad - they still lurk in furniture and floor boards. Opening the door for him to leave the last time. Closing the door and beginning this incredible journey to a new and soooo much better, happier and healthier me. 

So I guess it's fitting then, that eventually I would need to say goodbye to the place. I would need to move to a new apartment, with actual water pressure and granite countertops and parking. I would need to take these steps to move forward with my life and to start (hopefully) building a new life with the man I love. It is good, I suppose, that I'm escaping the shadows. But it was also home. Hopefully I'll feel that way here soon too.